Friendliness part 1

January 25, 2021 devotional

As you may already know, we are taking a look at 52 different character traits that should be found in the life of a Christian (download or view the Disciples Journal here).  Using The Disciple's Journal as our guide, this week we will examine friendliness.

Friendliness is the quality of displaying goodwill, warmth, and kindness toward others.  And in the life of a Christian, it is "desiring" that others experience these good things in their life.

Question #4 in the self-evaluation section asks, "Does my friendliness depend on how friendly others are?"  Our answer should be "no."  Our friendliness toward others should not depend on how friendly they are toward us.  And yet I am deeply aware that our unpleasant encounters with some people make it difficult to express friendliness toward them (question #9).  For those who have wounded us, it is quite difficult to desire their good will or feel warmth toward them.

For some of us, its easier to be friendly toward those we don't know than toward those who have hurt us deeply.  And yet, Jesus doesn't give us any wiggle room; there  is no escape clause.  He doesn't say, "Pray for those who have never hurt you."  Proverbs 24:17 says we should not rejoice when our enemy falls, and to not let our heart be glad when they stumble.  Why?  Because God takes no pleasure in this attitude.  We are to desire what is good and best even toward those who hate us or those who persecute us.  Yet, this is what many of us end up doing; we want bad things to happen to those who have mistreated us; we lack the characteristic of friendliness toward those who have been unfriendly toward us.  And I suppose the biggest question here is why; why are we unfriendly toward those who are unfriendly?

Question #14 in the self-evaluation section asks, Does God give me the right to be unfriendly toward certain people?"  And, just as in question #4, our answer here should also be "no."  Instead, we have a duty and a responsibility to demonstrate a heart-felt desire to see God's blessing fall upon everyone... even those who have wounded us.  We are to love and pray for those who have wounded us so we might demonstrate that we are truly children of God (Matthew 5:44-45).

Our inability to be friendly may be tied to our unwillingness to forgive.  Yet, keep in mind that Jesus warned us that if we are not willing to forgive the person who has hurt us, God will be unwilling to forgive us (Matthew 6:14-15).  So, its possible that our lack of friendliness is closely related to our refusal to forgive.

If you are already a friendly person, don't allow your circumstances or moods to affect your desire to see others blessed by God.  However, if friendliness is something you struggle with, ask the Lord to reveal why your heart is hardened toward others.  And if it is an issue related to unforgiveness, then just jump ahead to next weeks study.  We will examine the art of forgiveness then.

In the meantime, keep in mind that when we are talking about friendliness we are speaking about the Christian trait that desires what is good and best for those whom we meet.  And we'll spend some time this week looking at some biblical examples of friendliness.