By Pastor Greg
A quick tour through my garage
will reveal tools that are hung neatly on hooks or placed according to size in
a tool box. Nails and screws are kept
separate according to size and use in brightly colored part bins hung on the
wall. I keep my garage this organized
because I hate wasting time looking for tools; something I had to do often when
I still lived at home.
My parents never threw anything
away, and in my father’s garage finding a tool was an adventure. Oh, you might have been able to find what you’re
looking for eventually, if you looked past the old toasters, 1974 newspapers,
power tools that no longer power, and a dehumidifier that no longer
dehumidifies. Upon a crowded work bench
could be the tools you needed ‑ underneath a conglomeration of items who’s use
most of us would have assumed had expired long ago. There’s an old can opener, several jar lids,
a broken wooden spoon, a bent cheese cutter that makes funny shaped cheese,
several almost dead batteries, snarled string, a Ping‑Pong ball, a pile of
washers for the garden hose, several feet of extension cord with no plug and no
outlet, an old set of Christmas lights, and too many old razor blades
strategically placed next to the tools you’re looking for. Rummaging through the pile is like playing
Russian roulette, which is why somewhere in the garage there is an old box of
band aids . . . somewhere. Nothing was
ever useless in my parent’s house. Mom
and Dad kept everything. I’ve tried to
keep this from happening in my garage, but if you look real close you will find
a box marked “Think”. It’s a box full of
odds and ends that I “think” I might use someday.
In a throwaway society, people who
keep odds‑n‑ends are a dying breed. If
the old toaster doesn’t work, just throw it out. You can get a new one for less than ten
dollars. I know, I know, it’s only a
toaster. Most people don’t feel remorse
over a discarded appliance. But what
about our personal relationships? It
seems to me that many in our society treat people like an old broken appliance. If you grow tired of someone, just end the
relationship; you can always find someone else.
And that’s just what happens too.
Friends grow apart without remorse.
Brothers and sisters go their separate ways never to talk again. Employers use their employees until they
quit, and then hire new ones. Even
husbands and wives learn to live apart under one roof. And in the end we wonder why people feel worthless,
used, and despised.
This attitude about personal
relationships is nothing new. Even in Old
Testament times this was an issue. Why
else would God have to command His people to see another person as
valuable? God needed to establish a
standard of conduct that was different than what Israel saw in Egypt and what
they would see once they reached the land of Canaan (Leviticus 18:24). In Leviticus chapter 18, God established
sexual laws. He placed restriction on
who a person could sleep with. They were
commanded to have a high regard for others.
They were not to steal or cheat one another, defraud or rob their
neighbor, and to not spread slanderous gossip among the people (Leviticus
19:11-16). These laws applied to
everyone in Israel, even the servant or foreigner who lived among them (Exodus
20:10).
Unfortunately, Israel did not take
these commands very seriously. And the
men had little regard for the women among them.
Men were discarding their wives like yesterday’s trash. Deuteronomy 24:1-4 becomes a concession
because the men (and perhaps the women) of Israel had little regard for others
(see Jesus’ comments on this in Mark 10:5).
The people of Israel could not let go of their selfishness, and instead
succumbed to their personal desires.
I share all of this background so
that you might better understand just what Jesus was saying in Matthew
5:27-32. 27 “You have heard the
commandment that says, ‘You must not commit adultery.’ 28 But I
say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery
with her in his heart. 29 So if your eye—even your good
eye—causes you to lust, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to
lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And
if your hand—even your stronger hand—causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it
away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole
body to be thrown into hell.
31 “You have heard the law
that says, ‘A man can divorce his wife by merely giving her a written notice of
divorce.’ 32 But I say that a man who divorces his wife, unless
she has been unfaithful, causes her to commit adultery. And anyone who marries
a divorced woman also commits adultery”.
We have a tendency to focus only
on the obvious here. But it is directly
related to the attitude a person needs to develop in order to walk closely with
God. We lust for others because our needs and desires have
become greater than our concern and love for others. In just about every circumstance, a couple
becomes unfaithful because personal needs have overpowered a commitment. In just about every act of infidelity, that
other person who has aroused the lust in you is seen as an object that
can fulfill your needs and your desires. These people are desired only for what they
can do to you and for you. Apart from
that, we see no value in them.
Jesus has reminded us of God’s
earlier commands. We dare not view
others as worthless junk that can be discarded when they no longer make us
happy. To walk closely with God we must
value others, and in this case that attitude must infiltrate our sexual desires
AND our commitment to marriage.
I know this passage raises a lot
of questions about divorce. It is still
an unfortunate reality in our world today.
And I meet many people who are looking for answers. If you want to talk in length, we can
schedule some time together. But the
short answer to this deals with the law and
with grace, not one or the other. The
Lord says divorce is a sin and that it is a sin to remarry. He has, however, given a few provisions in
the Bible - if your spouse has not been faithful (as we read here), or if you
are married to a non-Christian who doesn’t want to stay with you (1 Corinthians
7:12-16). But beyond those exceptions,
Jesus speaks quite plainly about divorce and remarriage (see Mark 10:1-12). That’s the law part. The grace part is what comes next.
As with any sin a person might
commit, there is forgiveness. Paul
addressed this in Romans chapter seven as he struggled with sin even after
becoming a Christian. And he also
confessed to finding forgiveness for that sin in Christ Jesus our Lord. You see, the Lord does not look at a person
who has sinned as worthless trash to be thrown away but as something
valuable. In our Father’s Kingdom,
everyone is valuable. This may not make
sense to us, but I think that’s because we have not learned to value others the
way God does.
The main point here is that when
it comes to personal relationships, we need to move beyond the whole idea that we
don’t do things or think things because they are sins. We need to learn to see others as God sees
them. To walk closely with God is to
recognize the value of other people. And
on that day when we start seeing other people as God’s priceless treasure, they
no longer become some “thing” to be used for our personal pleasure then
discarded. In the end you will find
yourself walking closely with God when you learn to see the value in other
people.
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